The Number Doesn’t Matter

Self Love Series- Part II

We all have that one enemy that we hate. We step on it and pray that in those few seconds, you can be the best of friends. We hold our breath, and more or likely, we don’t like the number on the scale. For most of us, especially myself, I dread the moment of weighing myself. Just when I think that I’m doing good on the path of weight loss, the scale is always there to bring me back into reality.

But a few weeks ago, my brother said something profound. He said, “why do we define ourselves by a number?” And at that moment, I had to stop myself and think about it. Why do we define ourselves by a lousy three-digit number? Here are a few reasons why I thought so:

First of all, I defined myself by my weight number because it was beaten in my head by doctors. I’m sure that most of us have heard the phrases “you’re becoming obese,” and “You’ve gained weight. You need to start losing a few pounds.” Now doctors are doing their jobs, trying to keep their patients healthy, but none of those sayings are positive, nor will they give anyone encouragement to lose weight.

But the main reason was society. I have always felt that society was and is still trying to put me in a box that I don’t quite fit anymore. Growing up, I was always chubby/fat. Society wanted 16-year-old me to lose weight so I can look like skinny as a stick. But how was I going to do that? I mean I did sports; I ran, I danced a lot. What more could I have done without harming my body?

So years of my weight going up and down came down to one moment, one question. Why do we define ourselves by a number? Ask yourself that question, why? And if you are going to define yourself by a number, who are you doing it for? Being obsessed with a weight scale is not healthy. For the past couple of years, I have been working out, lifting more weights, and try to better myself and my weight for me. And what I learned is that no number, on any scale, can define who I am.

Who cares if I am not the skinniest woman in the world? I work out six days a week, I eat right, and I am healthy. And that’s all that I need to care about. If the weight goes down, that’s great. But stressing over how much I weigh will do nothing for me except gain more weight. And to be honest, I am living my best life as a curvy young woman, and no one can tell me any different.

Yeah, I might be bigger and curvier than my other friends but guess what? People are willing to pay thousands of dollars for my big ass and thick thighs. Plus size and curvy women are starting to make their presence known. If you have more meat on your skin, a bigger ass, a bigger chest, and a stomach, this is my advice for you. EMBRACE what you have and love what you have. Stop trying to confine yourself into a little square because your scale or your doctor told you that you weigh xyz. Start living for you and not for a three-digit number.

-Nadine Bourne